31 I will follow…

Leading when no one follows, a reductive transgression only in name.
No need need be desired or professed. No call can be articulated,
answered or even enacted.
The fallen soldiers and the encrusted whores hallucinating their pasts
with storied reflection that falls into place the more memory fails
to recollect more than reconstructed fictions.
My stomach turns, heaves, and turns again as my soul fail to collect
the necessary airmiles to get me on the waiting list, let alone
the great lists for heaven or hell. The ego smiles as the mind quails
in the perverse glory of our own destructive exercises. Passing time
passing poolside, quayside, this side of midnight.